


what's inside my head

by PrincezzShell101



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Dark Character, Episode Tag, Gen, Nogitsune Stiles, Spoilers for 3x19, Stiles Trapped in His Own Mind
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-19
Updated: 2014-02-19
Packaged: 2018-01-13 01:42:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1208170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrincezzShell101/pseuds/PrincezzShell101
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's okay.</p><p>Stiles knows it's not.</p>
            </blockquote>





	what's inside my head

**Author's Note:**

> So I've been on Facebook a lot lately, and today I saw this pic of Stiles in the last scene of 3x19. A lot of people who commented were adamantly sure that one drop of water running from his eye wasn't from the rain and he was indeed crying for hurting his brother yet not being able to stop.
> 
> Hence, this fic was born.

**_It's okay._ **

Stiles knows it's not. It's  _not_. Even with his determinacy, his unrelenting will, he's unable to take control of his own body. His fists, fighting against the barriers of his mind, are all but futile, the force behind the walls too strong to shatter, even fracture, with the nogitsune's dark powers tying him down to his subconscious.

It warps his face, twists his lips into an evil, sardonic smile that would never exist on him, not ever, as its fingers skitter-dance over the blade wedged inside his best friend's abdomen, before its hand— _his_ hand—jams it in further, the sinister demon relishing in the glee of it.

**_Does it hurt?_ **

" _Of course_ it fucking hurts!" Stiles yells, knows the nogitsune can hear him.

It ignores him.

**_Hey, look at me._ **

Scott's eyes, deep brown and unwavering, almost tear-filled, turn to stare right at it— _no_ , not it,  _him_ —and it is all too much, just too much to see that pain in Scott's eyes. His buddy, the one person he never  _ever_ wants to hurt. Now he is doing the unimaginable. And all because this sick, mother fucking  _trickster spirit_  is making him, forcing him to inflict agony on the ones he loves.

 ** _You should have done your reading, Scott._**   ** _See, a nogitsune feeds off chaos, strife and pain. This morning, you took it from Isaac, then you took it from Coach. And then from a dying deputy. All that pain. You took it all. Now, give it to me._**

" _No_! Don't do it! Scott!  _Don't fucking do it_!" he shouts, desperate. More chaos, pain and strife will be enough for this thing to wipe him out, rid him for good, until the only thing left inhabiting his body is the nogitsune itself.

He  _can't_ let that happen.

 ** _You really have to learn, Scott._**   ** _You really have to learn not to trust a fox._**

Stiles's eyes burn, sting with emotion—anger, fear, guilt—and his hands claw at the barrier, clashing against the fine line between control and no control. But it's not enough, none of it is, and his fingers itch, skin feeling like it's tearing apart.

**_Mmm-mmm. Know why? 'Cause they're tricksters._ **

"God fucking right you are, you bloody  _freakin_ '—!" His voice breaks, cracks and splits against his vocal cords, and it  _hurts_ , it hurts so fucking much. The sobs that tear out of him, rack his chest and hammer through his lungs, are gut-wrenching. He hasn't got the strength to keep himself up anymore, and now all he feels is the heavy weight of everything dragging him down, body collapsing in on itself.

**_We'll fool you._ **

"L-L-Like you did me—you fucking—fucking  _monster_ ," he chokes, jaw clenched, sharp and biting against his gums, his own blood slipping through the gaps in his teeth.

**_We'll fool everyone._ **

He screams. He screams and screams, bashing his fists violently against the obstruction that keeps him on the other side of his subconscious, voice hoarse and wrecked.

It's only when the prick of a needle strikes the back of the nogitsune's neck sending it writhing to the ground, and the sizzling, stabbing pain lights up his insides, does he stop screaming to fall into a whimpering barrage of fitful sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> I got the title from Confession (What's Inside My Head) by Red. I listened to it as well as Faceless (also by Red) while writing this and I found those two songs gave this fic more life in some ways.


End file.
